A new day...a new beginning...

Well, today is a brand new day...a new beginning for me. I got a second chance in life following the heart attack and now it's time for me to see the glass as half-full rather than half-empty! If he can't take me with my enthusiasm for life and my love to help all people, it's HIS loss, NOT MINE! I tried to tell him there was nothing to read between the lines and that I didn't "Have anything on him", but he didn't listen! So now, I must go on alone! It hurts...very much...but if he hates me for something I never did and will never do to hurt him, then I can't explain it any clearer than that.
Why do men always think that there has to be something behind why you would do something for them? I did things because I thought he would laugh and be happy because of it. For no other reason but that! I wish he would at least talk to me again, but he hates me for something that I can't figure out. I've tried to think back on things we talked about, but, for the life of me, I can't figure it out! There's nothing stupid about me, but I can't figure the logic of his reasoning! It makes no sense...I am as I am...all of my cards are on the table...take me as I am because I won't hide behind double-loaded words! What I say, I mean...and I will never hurt him! I'm not a vindictive person...I don't believe in it. I wish him that Lady Luck will follow him always...I wish him much success in his main business...I wish him success on the new website that I was supposed to be his partner. I wish that he will see his son soon, but if not, that they talk at least every week on IM. I hope his website goes viral...all around the globe. I made him an awesome logo and catch phrase for the website, but I guess he will never hear them.
He is too proud, I guess, to tell me he was wrong and that he wants to talk again. I wish he would ask...I would love to be his friend again. We used to talk all night about alot of things and we would chuckle with laughter about little things! It was so easy to get along before he decided that he hated me. He said he had read between the lines and he knew I had something to hold over him. BUT WHAT WAS IT??? I have no idea now and I didn't have any idea then! He blocked me so I can't contact him anymore. It makes me sick that he hates me at all. If I was guilty of anything, it was that I trusted him 100%, even gave him control of my computer. The cards and books I sent to him so that he would laugh so hard that he would cry! For no other reason known to me. I wanted to make his life easier by helping him with his new website, and to give him the very best web design available!I even thought about giving him the Epcot ticket and let him have all he can get for it to pay for his son's college fund! I wanted nothing in return except for great conversation with the man I fell for . He's such an interesting and complex man and I loved all the talks late in the nightand intothe wee hours of the morning. We laughed so hard and were so excited about doing things for the future together. But he accused me of trying to take his Twitter followers from him and for taking his new company from him! As far as the Twitter followers go, he encouraged me to get others followers to follow me, including his own. And for the website, he had said he wanted something to blow him away and said his host company had fantastic templates and everything to build it with. So I told him I looked into the company and would build him the finest website available! But, instead of being happy about it, he turned on me, accusing me of stealing that too. Then he blocked me from following him on Twitter.
I tried to explain on e-mail, but he must have only read the "MAN WAY": Misinterpreting all that he read, Allegations that he read things between the lines, and Yelling at me because of what he thought he read between the lines! I really wish we would talk again...we had so much fun! I forgive him completely. I'd make the first move if I thought he would talk. I pray that Jesus will soften his heart and allow him to see that I have NO ulterior motives! I just liked to be his close friend and collaborator on his books and the website! Then if something draws us closer, that's fine, and if not, they we would remain very best friends and business partners!
Oh well, I can't cry over spilt milk anymore...I will go on without him. But I'd rather be with him! He would be so proud of what I've done...I want to tell him that I am good in everything he taught me, but I can't because he hates me! I will cry occasionally, but I will go on!